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Wanted! Stories or Poems

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1 Wanted! Stories or Poems on 31/3/2010, 4:01 am


First topic message reminder :

Last night in Chatbox I asked Lucy and Jer how would they feel about getting a Book together on or about pd... let be a funny, serious, sad story or poem whatever comes into your head..we think it is a good idea and if any of you guys would like to tell your story please let us know..

26 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 21/12/2011, 3:53 pm


Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the hills
Nobody was twitching and shaking
Cause we all took our pills.

And Dear Wifie in her housecoat
Was finishing up the wrapping.
She looked at the couch as I
Was finishing up my lazy napping.

When out on the lawn there arose
Such a noise and excited Chatter
I asked Dear Wife to look out
To see what the heck was the matter.

When what to my eyes did suddenly appear
But a bus loaded with cold Irish Beer.
It turned with a jerk and came to a stop
Being followed by a siren and one excited cop

Off they all exited the bus driven by Rusty,
Claimed to be thirsty, their throats all dusty.
"To all my friends from Eyre", we drank the toast!
Gathered round my woodstove, I carved the roast.

We ate, laughed, and drank and Dear Emma sang
Still going strong as the midnight bell rang!
Then Good Old Rusty got them back on the bus
Tucked them in blankets, and without a fuss;

Flew back to Ireland with my friends so dear
"What a way to bring me great Christmas cheer"

"Whatcha saying" Wife asked, whipping the cream
"Nothing Dear" I said. Man was that a good dream!

Thanks for finishing the other one Marie and yours too Katy. Very nice! You guys talk Mice pie enough and it will happen.

Merry Christmas to you all

With sincere wishes and a warm heart,


27 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 21/12/2011, 1:56 am


Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a Mouse!
You see, our dear friend Marie, had decided the mice
In her batch of (mince) pies, would be ever so nice.

She went on her mission, the mice to surprise,
until all were the filling for her famous mice pies.
Perhaps in the new year she'll have change of heart,
and instead of mice pies, she'll make nice apple tarts!

28 Wanted Xmas stories or poems on 20/12/2011, 5:45 am


T'is six sleeps till Xmas and Santa is set
to deliver his goodies in time for the fest.
His reindeer are frisky and rearing to go
but it's looking unlikely there'll be any snow!

All who wisely sent Santa their lists
are hoping and praying he'll be able to fix things
So that all of their dreams arrive
safely ,in time and with no unforeseen slips!

Now jb might think, I forgot the mice pies
but the traps were all set and delivered the prizes!
So as the big day approaches, here's wishing to all
a very happy Xmas and lots of good cheer........
Enjoy a mice pie (or two ) to go down with the beer.......Hick, Hick!!

Last edited by MarieB on 20/12/2011, 5:46 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : spelling !!!!)

29 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 19/12/2011, 2:09 pm


Twas a week before Christmas
And all through this House
Mice pies were being baked
But still lacked a mouse.

Now with Momma in Exam Week,
I came in, removed my cap,
Threw wood on the stove
And laid down for a nap.

30 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 19/11/2011, 2:03 pm


Hah, good one Katie,

Silly old Murphy! I don't get out much but even I know that she was indicating the encounter was over, the evening was over, and that she was that she was sleepy and going home to bed and goodbye. Oui? Oui? Laughing

31 Murphy in Paris on 19/11/2011, 8:35 am


Murphy, a furniture dealer from Dublin, decided to expand the line of furniture in his store, so he decided to go to Paris to see what he could find.

After arriving in Paris, he visited with some manufacturers and selected a line that he thought would sell well back home. To celebrate the new acquisition, he decided to visit a small bistro and have a glass of wine, As he sat enjoying his wine, he noticed that the small place was quite busy and the other chair at his table was the only vacant seat in the house.

Before long, a very beautiful young parisian girl came to his table; asked him something in french (which Murphy couldn't understand) so he motioned to the vacant chair and invited her to sit down. He tried to speak to her in english, but she did not speak his langauge. After a couple of minutes of trying to communicate with her, he took a napkin and drew a picture of a wine glass and showed it to her. She nodded, so he ordered a glass of wine for her. After sitting together at the table for a while, he took another napkin and drew a picture of a plate with food on it, and she noded....They left the bistro and found a quiet cafe that featured a small group playing romantic music. They ordered dinner, after which he took another napkin and drew a picture of a couple dancing. She nodded, and they got up to dance. They danced until the cafe closed and the band was packing up.

Back at their table, the young lady took a napkin and drew a picture of a four-poster bed. To this day, Murphy has no idea how she figured out he was in the furniture business!!

32 Irish Wedding on 17/11/2011, 11:57 am


Recently at an Irish Wedding reception, someone yelled....*Would all the married men please stand next to the one person who has made their life worth living*

........The bartender was almost crushed to death!!!! Smile

33 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 10/11/2011, 10:05 pm


Indeed Cathy your poem has brought a tear(s) to my eye, not every household are in happy spirits at Christmas time as I speaking for myself find it a lonely time..every year i tell myself 'this year will be better'..somethings in life we have no control over, i guess we just have to make the best of what we have or try anyway.

34 christmas fear on 10/11/2011, 9:49 am


this is one of my darker poems unfortunately christmas is not happy in every household .and it is so sad where children are concerned ..

Christmas Fear

DAds out late , hush now His car We hear
Driving reckless in wrong gear,

Babys hiding little eyes full of fear
still bear marks from previous year

Door opens with a bang
Stench of sweat and stale Beer
banish thoughts of Christmas cheer.
Oh how I Hate this time of year .

Moms in the kitchen I hear her Praying,
but her pleas for mercy are all in vain
the sound of shattered glass from the window pane ,

Mom called me to her side thee words to hear
I must leave you my end is near .

You must grow up now and be a man
Look after Baby as best you can .

dry your eyes my little dear ,

I promise I will come for you in the new year Crying or Very sad

35 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 15/9/2011, 3:25 am


Ha ha good one

36 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 14/9/2011, 9:42 am


A man went to the Police Station wishing to speak to the burglar who had broken into his house the night before.
"You will get your chance in court" said the desk sergeant.

"NO,NO,NO, said the man, "I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I've been trying to do that for years!" Surprised

37 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 11/9/2011, 1:50 pm


Good one Patsy. How true, When you check into a hospital for tests, leave your dignity at the door!

38 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 9/9/2011, 12:55 am


(Author Unknown)

!! A final diagnosis !!

Thought I'd let my doctor check me,
'Cause I didn't feel quite right. . .
All those aches and pains annoyed me
And I couldn't sleep at night.

He could find no real disorder
But he wouldn't let it rest.
What with Medicare and Blue Cross,
We would do a couple tests.

To the hospital he sent me
Though I didn't feel that bad.
He arranged for them to give me
Every test that could be had.

I was fluoroscoped and cystoscoped,
My aging frame displayed.
Stripped, on an ice cold table,
While my gizzards were x-rayed.

I was checked for worms and parasites,
For fungus and the crud,
While they pierced me with long needles
Taking samples of my blood.

Doctors came to check me over,
Probed and pushed and poked around,
And to make sure I was living
They then wired me for sound.

They have finally concluded,
Their results have filled a page.
What I have will someday kill me;
My affliction is old age.

39 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 4/9/2011, 10:54 pm


You have that right Lucy. My Dad went downhill so fast. He was the go to Guy, we always got Dad to help or advise. Suddenly he was putting oatmeal in the coffee filter. It was really bad when he knew he was loosing it, so frustrated he was at his loss. Now that it is lost, he is more relaxed. He loves his meals, bedtime and all of the nurses. They are so great with him. He greets them all with a kiss on the hand like a real romantic.

40 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 4/9/2011, 10:44 pm


Brilliant poems JB and Katie. JB alzimers is such a terrible illness God keep it far away from us.

41 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 4/9/2011, 10:33 pm


Good Morning,

Nice poem Katie. Thanks for the good Wishes Marie and Ems. Here in Ontario you put your name in for a home that you choose and wait for a bed to come available. We thought it would take a little longer but her evaluation by the placement office moved her to the top. Bottom line is that it seemed a little sudden. Last night I talked to her on the phone and Dad too, such as I could. They were having tea together and then she was going to walk him back to his room. You have to laugh sometimes. When my Brother Doug and I were registering Mom, Dad was brought into the room. He was surprised and his eyes lit up. He indicated that this was his wife and he introduced me to the nurse as his son named Ralph. Doug calls me Ralph now. Cool

42 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 4/9/2011, 9:53 am


We've never met and yet we've come to know each other well.
It may be that the written word says more than tongue can tell.
Just a paper friendship that you'd think would fade away-
with the changes in our lives that come from day to day.
Much has happened, things have altered. Friends have come and gone-
Time has passed, but yet our lovely friendship still goes on!....

43 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 4/9/2011, 7:11 am


Well Jb.i can only second everything Marie has said..

you Jb are a genius and a good friend to all of us here..hugs on the way to Ontario to you and your family.

Ems x

44 Wanted stories or poems on 4/9/2011, 1:27 am


jb you are a genius!

Your poem was so moving, I was in tears as I read it. I assume you were talking about your own mom and dad? How did you manage to tell their story so eloquently and at the same time communicate such depths of compassion for their life predicaments ? It must have been very difficult to write about your mothers pain in being parted from your dad but their coming together again in the end just brings-everything full circle on the wheel of life. I hope your mum is happy and enjoying the rest she undoubtedly deserves. Brilliant!

45 Mom and Dad on 2/9/2011, 11:24 pm


He had lost his mind, not his heart
But had to leave home and they were apart.
For care in the Manor after 60 years together
6 kids, Love, and all sorts of life's weather.

Yesterday was her turn to turn the key
And leave the House. Too hard for her to be
82 years and live alone, even with a hand,
The glass is present, and there runs the sand.

After running the house, pies for the church
Family and friends but her life took a lurch.
Reality showed its face, she knew that time was up
To be cared for, with someone to fill her teacup.

And get the groceries and cook all her meals
Hard to admit it, I think I know how she feels.
For a woman who used to cook meals for about thirty
To get herself fed and not let the house get dirty.

Even with help and support, the year has been rough
My Mom was not a complainer she was strong and tough.
Now she can relax, no cooking,or scrubbing the floor,
Mom and Dad are safe, together under one roof once more.

46 Friends on 31/8/2011, 10:23 am


Old friends may be dear, but let us never turn away,
from the chance to make new friends,for there may be a day,
when changes come, as come they must, time passes, ways divide.
Grateful we may be to find a new friend at our side.
So never say that it's too late, another heart to win.
Another door to open, a new friendship to begin.

47 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 30/8/2011, 11:12 pm


jb49 wrote:Very nice uplifting poems Katie and Cathy. Thanks for writing them. Man, I'm hanging out with a pretty talented bunch aren't I?


Here Here Jb..your quiet talented yourself!

48 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 30/8/2011, 1:35 pm


Very nice uplifting poems Katie and Cathy. Thanks for writing them. Man, I'm hanging out with a pretty talented bunch aren't I?


49 words of wisdom on 30/8/2011, 7:51 am


the reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail not his tongue..

any man that owns a cow can always find a woman to milk her ..

a boys best friend is his motherand theres no spancel stronger than her apron strings .

the grass may be greener next door but its just as hard to cut ..

some people cause happiness where ever they go. some whenever they go.

some people would walk a mile after your coffin .but wouldnt cross the road to congratulate you


its not the things
that can be bought
that are lifes richesst treasure.
its just the little things
that money canot measure.
a cheerful smile a friendly word
and a helping hand where ever .

50 Re: Wanted! Stories or Poems on 30/8/2011, 2:54 am


Try out a smile when you're down in the dumps
And the world seems so dreary and grey;
laugh at the clouds, when the sky's in a mood,
And you'll frighten the raindrops away!
Look on the bright side of life when you can,
For surely it just goes to show,
By thinking that way, you'll be finding each day
The bright side's the best side to know!

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